By Daniel J. Benor, MD

Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism.
                     – Carl Jung

Addictions are cravings for something we feel we need in order to feel better. With substance addiction there is a biochemical habituation to having a substance in our bloodstream.

Addictions are also possible to social interactions or to self-reinforcing behaviors without biochemicals. We may attach a value to having praise, success, high earnings, domination, submission, to experiencing a particular sensation, or to many other ways of behaving. These behaviors may assume the proportions and control over our lives that are no different from addictions to alcohol or drugs.

Bob would do anything to help anyone, without expectation of any compensation. He could neglect his work, his family and his health in order to be of service to others – even when this threatened his earnings and the patience of his loving wife and family.

Trudy had risen rapidly through the corporate ranks to become a department manager. She worked till all hours of the night, often took work home over the weekend and never took holidays, driven by her need to have an ever more prestigious position with a higher salary.

Jeff was a tyrant at home, demanding that his common law wife, Shauna, obey his every wish and whim without question. If his toast was not hot when he came to the table he would shout at her; if dinner wasn’t ready when he returned from work he would pour into the toilet whatever was cooking in the pots; and if he was drunk he might slap her around in the process.

After many years of being abused in these ways, Shauna left her home to live in a shelter while Jeff was at work. After several months, she met Fred, who was warm and supportive. She admitted to her therapist that while she liked Fred a lot, she felt she didn’t know if Fred really cared for her because he never shouted at her or hit her.

Richard came for therapy because he was worried that his habit of driving fast when he felt angry or depressed might get him or someone else injured or killed.

All of these people were unhappy with their behaviors but unable to change them. While some of them came to realize that they experienced temporary relief from stress, anxieties and other troublesome emotions through these behaviors, they were unhappy and distressed to find themselves unable to control their lives.

Transformations

We imagine we are addicted to food or alcohol or sex, but our primary addiction is to the mind. We think we are what we think. We suffer from a case of mistaken identity. We imagine that every voice every, every intention is in the mind, is all that is real. We buy into every advertisement that passes through consciousness. We are giant consumers of the mind. We are so easily fooled. We mistake a passing cloud for the immensity of the sky. We keep losing ourselves in thought.
                     – Stephen Levine

We are attached to our self-images. Our negative self-images are born in traumas, often very early in our life. These distressing experiences are held in our unconscious mind – where they can be hidden from our awareness so that we don’t suffer from their distress and pain.

Burying and hiding our traumas protects us from feeling overwhelmed. At the time of the trauma, burying our distress leaves us with more resources to deal with the emergencies that are stressing us. Over time, however, the buried memories and hurts, fears, angers and other feelings fester and drain our energies.

Dismantling and releasing the negative, self-defeating experiences and habits resulting from them is not as difficult a task as many might assume. People who have used TWR report great success in doing this.

When we want to be free even more than we want pleasure, when the source of satisfaction, rather than its mirror reflection, is our goal, our addictions become rungs in the ladder we climb to free the pain of our longing and enter the joy of our true nature.
                     – Stephen Levine

TWR can help to do this by:

The life force pours out of you through the holes you create in your life through what I call addiction. Addictions are ways we have of fooling ourselves. In fact, the more intelligent we are, the more we can trick ourselves. If we don’t smoke, drink alcohol, or take drugs, we think we’re just fine because we don’t have any addictions. But we may have addictions that may be even more insidious. Usually the worst are emotional addictions, such as addictions to sadness, to chaos, to a feeling that we’re not good enough.
                     – Lynn Andrews

Related articles:

Challenging Experiences Need Not Be Negative

How’s Wrong With Me?

 

Further articles coming soon:

Bullying

My Way Is Better than Your Way

Our Way is Better than Your Way

Discomforts, Dislikes and Deadly Fears of Being Wrong

Creative Clearing and Centering

 

You may reproduce all or parts of this article in your journal, magazine, ezine, blog or other web or paper publication on condition that you credit the source as follows: Copyright © 2012 Daniel J. Benor, MD, ABHM   All rights reserved. Original publication at  WholisticHealingResearch.com  where you will find many more related articles on this and similar subjects of wholistic healing.